June 26, 2009

Wolf Shirt

A friend of mine showed this to me on Amazon.com. It's a wolf shirt with a humorous review. Take a look.

10,931 of 11,023 people found the following review helpful:
Dual Function Design, November 10, 2008
By B. Govern "Bee-Dot-Govern"

This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.

Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.

4 comments:

Krissy said...

So I suspect that the next time I see you, you too will be wearing a wolf shirt?

Amy N. said...

haha! that was great thanks for sharing it.

Sarah said...

I loved that! That is so funny Scott. Your blog makes me laugh really hard. But not hard enough to pee my pants.

Scarlet said...

scott... did you write that review??